The "Happily Ever After" Myth
The "Happily Ever After" Myth
Do You Know Your True Self?
Are You Living Your Purpose?
Freedom U Is Now Open But For Limited Time Only
Did you know Hollywood has been influencing the direction of your life ever since you were a child?
For example, you might have grown up thinking if you just followed the rules, success would come to you and your life would be a breeze.
You probably grew up thinking there’s someone special out there just for you.
And you’re probably hoping one day everything will fall into place and you’ll live happily ever after.
Yet the fact is over 55% of marriages in the West end in divorce. And in Asia, more than half of married couples live in separate beds.
Even among the couples who stay together, many live lives of quiet desperation, only remaining together because of the kids — there’s no passion in their relationships anymore and they become more like friends than a couple.
Stop letting Hollywood brainwash you!
Hopefully, you're wise enough to know the Hollywood depiction of life is total B.S.
You’re not automatically going to meet the person of your dreams and live happily ever after.
Though it may feel nice to think about, it is a mere fantasy and a lie.
You’ll never get far in life holding onto this delusion.
The truth is, life is a struggle.
Happiness isn’t your birthright. It’s something you have to work for.
In the billions of years of evolution on this planet, life was dictated by survival of the fittest.
Evolution doesn't give a sh!t about you or your happiness—your genes only care about their survival and replication.
To be happy and successful, you have to embrace effort as a part of life.
This is the only way to get to the next level and find lasting fulfillment.
Happy and successful people already know this.
So how can you overcome struggle and find real happiness and success in life?...
In this first video of a 4-part series, I’m going to reveal how you can transcend the game of survival of the fittest, and flourish in your personal life and relationships.
Watch the video above.
Best,
David Tian Ph.D.
Unless you watch what I’m about to reveal, I can almost guarantee your relationships will fail, and you’ll never get to experience true fulfillment in life.
I don’t want this to happen to you. Watch this video now and you won’t have to worry about missing out on the life you want!
QUESTION: "Have you or anyone you know fallen for the Happily Ever After Myth? If so, what was the result?"
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68 responses to “The “Happily Ever After” Myth (Freedom U Video 1)”
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Survival of the fittest is what life really is. We all need to strive to become better human beings because the act of becoming better is in itself a win.
My girlfriend at the time left me. It was so bad for me emotionally draining me , that I couldn’t trust another woman again for the next ten years.
“Evolution doesn’t care about you” – you are so right, David. Many of us mistakenly think that we will somehow be “spared” of bad things happening to us but that’s not the case at all. Evolution goes on and on, with its strict rules: if we follow them, we will evolve, if not, we will die.
I agree with what you said. Nature has its own rhythm and once you get to know it and follow it you’ll do great. Problem is most of us don’t make the effort of learning the rules of the game and then wonder why we’re unhappy.
Why is it that so many couples divorce? 60% is huge! Why does this happen so often?
I think it’s because people hurry in getting married. They often get married very young when they have no idea what they really want.
Also, I would add that some people get married very soon after they meet. Sometimes after just 1 year which is insane. Why not wait? Why not live together for a few years and see how you do?
My mom stayed together with my dad because of her 3 kids. I am sorry she chose to do things this way. I know she was trying to protect us but it wasn’t worth. No one should stay in a state of unhappiness just because of the kids.
I have a similar experience. We had 2 kids and I wanted to try and stay together because of the kids but realized it was just stupid to do so. No one was actually happy so we divorced and we are all happier than ever. Looking forward to your program, David!
My freedom is the most important. Without it, I feel like I’m not alive, like I’m just existing, not living.
I feel the same way. If I don’t have my freedom to do the things I want to do, I feel worthless.
I am a man who believes that true love is impossible to find. I would love for you to prove otherwise but I’m not getting my hopes up…
True love is not impossible. It may not be easy to find but if you search hard enough and know what you’re looking for, then it will come.
I also believed love is a myth but I used the Rock Solid Relationships program from David and everything changed for me. I highly recommend it!
I think I’m at the stage of the false self and I was thinking I had freedom but I don’t. Your video made this clear for me. Looking forward to the next one(s).
I need constant validation from others and without it I don’t feel ok. It’s very tiresome to say the least.
I’m certain David can help with this and I would wait for his next videos plus look up his site and look at his older programs and videos – those are very helpful as well!
I don’t want a life of regret! I don’t want to look back and say “what if?”! Come on with video 2, David!
Me too! I want to live a better life! To feel loved, appreciated and happy! To live wonderful experiences with my loved ones and to find that special someone that understands me.
David can help with this because he has experienced different things and learned from them and shares his knowledge with us. I learned more about life and love from his free videos (this one included) than from anything else (that is free). His paid programs are very good.
I have fallen for the happy ever after myth. I thought things would just work out with the first woman I dated. I was so wrong. I’m now feeling unhappy with my life and myself.
I love you, David! Keep up the wonderful work! I’ve been with you from the start and it’s a pleasure to see you evolve into the person you are today!
You are one of the bravest and smartest men I have heard talk on the subject of love and relationships. You are not afraid to get real and tell it like it is. I just wanted to say thank you for allowing your real self to be seen here. So many just put on an act and you can tell. I may be young but I am more aware than I have ever been.
Today’s world in the West is a mess. We are tempted with meaningless and emotionless sex at every turn. We have woman in growing numbers telling us being men or being “like a man” is wrong. It is hard to find balance in anything when it comes to relationships. This video opened my eyes to a lot and I can’t wait for the next one.
You are completely right, Christopher about the west is a mess. And all of the temptation from women. I get about 5 to 10 messages a day from women all over the world wanting me to go to there website where they have free videos of them naked. Most of them direct you to a dating site. Where you would never talk to the one who messaged you in the first place. I find it all quite amazing. Specially when they are 18. Guys spend all there money and time on this. Society tells these girls this is okay. You don’t get me wrong do what makes you happy. I’m just not sure why this makes them so happy. I’m sure one day they will figure it out. If not I guess they will be old broke and alone. I see a lot of them also appear to be gay. Which is fine as well. And I have also had that myth in my life that you meet someone and its forever. I’m much smarter now. Because Of David’s help. I started in 2017. Paid for one of his courses and watched so many videos. My life kind of took off. 2018 was the best year of my life. I’m happy. Still no women in my life most of my friends are no longer in my life. I took out the trash. Made so new friends. Brought back some very old friends that I lost contact with. All at the perfect time. When they needed my help. So, I told them my story. And about David. So, I passed along his info I guess. I hope that take the plunge and dive in. And get some life changing advice and teachings. I know my 2019 is going to be even better then 2018.
Awesome, Derek! Thanks for your sharing some of your journey! Here’s to a kickass 2019 for us!
Most of my life was done for others. I dressed, acted, and held interests in things I truly was not passionate about just to appeal to people that didn’t even know me beyond the surface I painted. I am so happy for this series. I feel like you are talking to me as a friend, a brother. Thank you.
I spent 7 years in therapy and I can tell you, you are spot on. I didn’t feel like I was the real me. Something you left out is that a lot of people take their false self into the beginning of a relationship. Once the true self shows on both sides, it often is unpleasant. This is one of the biggest reasons relationships fail long term. You have to be yourself, love yourself, respect yourself before you will be able to do this for someone else.
I grew up believing the fairytale. I took this idea into my 20’s and I was never happy. No man was ever good enough. I saw flaws and reason to quit on guys left and right. I did not come to the realization of what I was doing in my mind until I hit 35. Two failed marriages, no kids, and unhappily single… But this is my turning point. Love your work David. You get human relationships.
Sex is a beautiful thing when you find a mate. When you go through life passing through person after person, how do you expect to be happy? Sex has no real depth without commitment or love. This is at least what I believe. Another great series man. Keep them coming!
I am seeing two trends when it comes to people these days… They are either too aggressive or too oppressive. The are constantly fighting or constantly looking to be beat. How can you build a great relationship with anyone in either of those mindsets!? You just cant build one that lasts like this.
THANK YOU! So many guys these days don’t like to say survival of the fittest because it is a “violent mindset”. BULL! We have to learn to adapt and over come struggle after struggle and that is what makes us who were are physically and mentally. You are a smart dude and what you teach needs to be heard by more.
Evolution has never been explained so well by anyone else. I loved your take on it. I noticed a lot of people today can’t be happy in relationships because they think it should always be good so the second something goes wrong, they want out or they just can’t be happy with who they are with.
I fell for that myth for years and it just isn’t true to life. We all walk around thinking what we see on TV is real and it isn’t. It ruins our relationships when we compare our own to what we see on TV and in movies. They hardly show the “after after”. Another great video man. Love your work!
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Yes I have. It felt like a desperation in waiting for the right moment to reach me. I felt hopeless and helpless. Nothing in the end ever happened like a miracle to me. In the end, I gave up being that way and decided to take responsibility to my life and myself.
There are many students around me at university told me the good life and relationship would all “naturally” happen by not even thinking about it (they later clarified they avoided thinking about it when this urge to think appeared). I have no idea on how it turned out for them in reality. Judging from my interaction with them, they are always happy-go-lucky 24/7 which somehow seemed to me quite unrealistic.
At the other extreme, some colleagues I met during my internship seemed resentful and told me in the first time eating out together that the reality is harsh, whined about their life and told me that I shouldn’t be this naive. I then chose to eat out by myself.
Thanks for the questions. I hope this can offer you perspective to help you with your vision. ?
Thanks for sharing, Hui Hong!
Happiness isn’t our birth right. It isn’t. Happiness is what we create ourselves. It can’t be found somewhere. We may look all we want. It’s when we do the things that bring us joy that we find happiness.
Isn’t Richard Dawkins awesome? I read The Selfish Gene and it changed the way I look at life.
You are so right about embracing the struggle! It took me years to understand this but once I did, happiness was by my side all the time. I can’t wait for your program to learn even more!
Therapy can help in some cases, but it didn’t in mine. I hope your program can help because I’ve heard good things about you.
When you said the word starts with F I immediately thought of :)). Sorry! Glad to hear that’s not what you meant ;)!
The whole 3 freedoms thing is so interesting! Never thought of it this way before.
I’ve been following you for years, David and you always over deliver so I am impatiently waiting for your new launch!
This might seem like a stupid question but is this for women as well? Or just men?
Hey Daniela, it’s for BOTH women and men!
Thank you so much David, long time follower here, 2012-2013. Looking forward to the new plan!!
The idea of getting old and not getting the thing that you always wanted has always hauted me. Great video david,
This isa brilliant video David, i personally don’t agree that everything is written and its “meant to be”. looking forward to the next one . Greetings from CA.
“It is not the strongest or the most intelligent who will survive but those who can best manage change. That’s evolution” I love this prahse from college and i love the way you explain things. Keep em’ coming!
Happy ever after indeed is a myth, i couldn’t agree more. We’ve been brainwashed by Hollywood for soo long. Good to see someone out there brave and smart enough to say it..
Embracing the struggle is key. You need to see where you are in order to know where you’re going… God bless you for these series
“Survival of the fittest dictates that there is a loser”. Too bad hollywood won’t show this. Pathetic but kudos to you for being able to see and speak and help the people on the other side.
omg you’ve read richard dawkins, that is fn awesome. great clip
“Your genes dont care about your happines” yep, same way that evolution doesn’t. We need to take care of that on our own.
I’m looking forward to this program. Your breakdown the catalytic struggle seems to have a match with mine.. i’ will definitely check it out!
“Over 60% of the marriages in the west end up with divorce” How much do you think that has to do with the “Happy ever after” effect? Really interesting point of your video
hah really intersting point that you made that caught my eyes was that when people realize that the “happy ever after” is a myth. I’d love to hear some of the stories of people when they found this out. Perhaps in the next one? looking forward to it for sure
We have online shopping, online clothes, groceries, online schools but not online therapies (at least not good ones). Really interesting
wow haha, you really had me there at the f word. lol. Good points on the Three Freedoms. I couldn’t agree more when you say that people should be themselves instead of putting up personas of themselves.
I didn’t know you were married, David. Congrats and may you both feel true happiness! And may I find my special someone with your help!
“You’d do it even if the money wasn’t there. You’d do it because you love it.” Is there really such a feeling? How do you get there?
Great video, looking forward to learning more on self, purpose and love. Yes, I fell in the trap and navigating new world.
Hi David. Thanks for the amazing video!
Yes I was fallen for the Happily ever after that myth. It was like an infinite loop, you just wait for that special person to fall in your life, and hope, that then all of the problems will wanish away and you are going to be happy and live happily after that. But you are not in control of that, and it never will be how we imagined it…So, thanks to your amazing videos, I realized, that my happiness is not in my control, but others. It depends of others.
So I’m in the process of transformation, and thanks for making it easier for all of us.
Enjoy your videos. Eye opening! Asking myself those same questions still Bottles me? & yes, I have fallen for that myth. I have yet to learn more from you.
The other myth is that of the ‘Nice Guy’. That women like and want the ‘Nice Guy’. Also in the West, there is an agressive campaign against masculinity in the name of equality. Equality is good. I want equality for my daughter to do whatever she wants to do. But there is an agressive-equality = men and women are the same agenda and its false. Men and women can both be CEO’s, roadsweepers, pilots etc but they are not the same in needs / wants. Nice guy agenda and equality agendas often clash. E.G. Hold a door open for a woman may get you kudos from one person for being nice or a gentleman, while a rant from another for being sexist, mysogynist. I hold doors open for EVERYONE, because it’s polite, it helps people and often you have a small friendly interaction that is good for everyone’s soul. I’ve found women, as you point out, want FREEDOM to do what they want to do, what they want from men is strength and a principled life from them. Strength to support them, living by their true values ( nice is a part of that, but not all the time, nice all the time in the past got you eaten). I don’t have a big pool of women I’ve been intimate with, but ALL of them, some very strong successful in life women, want the man to take the lead in bed.
I bought into the Happily ever after myth. Society / my wife just wants me to be a nice guy who looks after everyone else first myth.
I’m on my way to divorce. I’ve learned the hard way. I’m in a good place, now have purpose, drive and have better insight into my and others happiness. But I’ve lost all I held dear to get there.
Throughout my life I’ve always been drawn into these ruts of the feeling of going nowhere. Eventually I’d pull out of it for a while only to be drawn back in. In these ruts I’ve had partners just to lose them in the process. I just got married a few months ago to the most wonderful woman I’ve ever met but now I’m falling back into one of these ruts. It is causing my relationship with her to fall apart. I feel that I’m losing her and it’s just making the whole situation worse. HELP ME PLEASE!
I was in the Myth from high school to early college. I was in my first and only long term relationship. I decided that she was the one I was going to marry and I assumed we would always be as happy as we were in the beginning. We started to have problems, but I just assumed we would work them out and go back to being happy. They never worked out and she shocked me by ending the relationship. I hit rock bottom, as other areas of my life were also going badly. I realized I did not know enough about how to create the life I want and I was chasing things for the wrong reasons. Before that time, I has followed some pickup stuff. I realized that their advice was not helpful for the relationship. I wanted something more.
Ha! I know on an intellectual level that “happily ever After” & “The one(Ideal mate)for me will just come into my life” etc…is a myth, and see the evidence of it all around me! Yet for some reason on an emotional (Lizard brain)level I just can’t stop believing it! I feel like I walk around in this state of self imposed delusion while consciously being aware. Of course life is easier if it were true but yet we know it to be false.